I saw this, stole this and don’t know who wrote it.

All the obits written about Saddam were incomplete. All left out a complete listing of all his surviving sons and daughters. A corrected paragraph follows:

He was predeceased by two sons, Uday and Qusay, and is survived by fifteen sons:

Sooflay, a restaurateur; Guday, who lives in Australia; Huray, a sports fanatic; Sashay, who is gay; Kuntay and Kintay, twins living in Africa; Sayhay, a baseball player; Ojay, a stalker and murderer; Gulay, a singer and entertainer; Ebay, an internet entrepreneur; Biliray, a country music star; Ecksray, a radiologist; Puray, a manufacturer of kitchen blenders; Raygay,who lives in Jamaica; and Tupay, who is bald.

Also survived by seven daughters: Lattay, a coffee-shop owner; Bufay, a big eater; Dushay, owner of a feminine-care-products company; Phayray, an actress; Sapheway, a grocery store owner; Ollay, who lives in Mexico; and Gudlay, a prostitute.

There is reportedly another surviving son, Oyvay, but he has been disowned by the family.

I feel like “you know what” today. I wasn’t feeling well yesterday, but I went on in to work. Today, I feel twice as bad. Believe it or not, I’m one of those people who despise calling in sick.

Sick days are rare for me. I lose a lot every year, but I don’t care. However, I woke up this morning with a fever, congestition and sore throat. I haven’t shaken them yet.

I had two stories I really wanted to do today, but I’ll probably play catch-up. Instead, I’m sucking down cold medicine like a champ.